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Showing results for tags 'outdoors'.
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You might well imagine that Loveless Motel doesn't celebrate Valentine's Day. Faithless Lodger! Of course we do! But we also recognize the difference between recreational sex, romance and love! So here's hoping you receive a bit of all of that whenever you need to, but if you stay with us, there's virtually no way that you wouldn't receive at least one out of three. So from our founders, Edgar Loveless and Sinjin Birdwhistle, to Booboo and Yogi, Happy Valentine's Day
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- edgar loveless and sinjin birdwhistle
- bruce of la
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446. Sometimes interns don't work out...
CalHowdy posted a blog entry in Loveless Motel Parody backup
Despite the best efforts of our Intern Onboarding classes and instructors, sometimes a candidate just doesn't work out. Experience tells us that we really have to watch it when tapping blondes for our programming. A prime example is seen here; a classic difference between the literal and the figurative. Never tell a blonde already struggling with basic concepts to "get a move on" - that structure is going nowhere. Luckily, we have a successful offboarding process in which a man can work off the time and money we have spent on him, and he'll have a choice of joining the housekeeping staff until his debt is paid, or becoming a Certified Hustler (pending the outcome of a rigorous interview process), in which case his debt may be forgiven, or reduced. -
Don't be the guy who's embarrassed at the crucial moment when he says "Get those legs up in the air!" Loveless Motel has the solution: let our popular yoga instructor, Mr. Stretch N. Spreadam teach you how to attain the most complicated positions with ease. Meet Stretch on the pool deck every odd calendar day, and in the evenings at Ticklers Lounge where he is a bar back
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429. Big Bones found during Nutbush Campground excavation
CalHowdy posted a blog entry in Loveless Motel Parody backup
Excavations are continuing on Nutbush Campground out behind Aluminum City. Guest interest has piqued when it was rumored that big bones were being talked about in relation to the work crew seen accessing the property in the early morning hours. A few of the men have apparently been seen using the urinals and stalls at Loveless Truck Stop, spending a little more time than is necessary for just pissing. But in fact, the biggest news is that a REALLY big bone has been found while clearing a wooded area for a picnic pavilion at the campground. A local amateur paleontologist and weekend ossuarian tells us that we have found a dinosaur bone millions of years old and as big as a man! We are currently in discussions about what to do with it. Options from displaying it in the lobby to cutting it into small bits and selling them as souvenirs, with engravings such as "I got boned at Loveless Motel" have been discussed. Also on the list of possibilities is to have rubber facsimiles made to be sold at Toys for Boys, located off the lobby.-
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- paleontology
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428. Loveless Motel builds Nutbush Campground
CalHowdy posted a blog entry in Loveless Motel Parody backup
In the spirit of continually offering new experiences for our guests, and in keeping with our roots, going back to the hunting lodge first built by founders Edgar Loveless and Sinjin Birdwhistle, Loveless Motel announces commencement of the construction of Nutbush Campground at Loveless Motel. Crews are hard at work, and despite that perpetual priapic state, they are still getting a lot done, and with our temperate winter weather, we project an opening date of early spring. Located in the rustic area just beyond the back of Aluminum City, and roughly adjacent to the area of The Stables and the Silver Bullet Bar, the project will complete the vision of fun in the outdoors, including cabins, tent sites, and plenty of nature trails, as well as a camp store, communal showers and latrines.-
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- nutbush campground
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Guests of the Bunkhouse have been lodging complaints for a few days now regarding stolen jock straps and jeans that have gone missing when using the communal showers there. Cowboys over at The Stables can really work up a sweat what with showing city boys the ropes and all, and it's just a natural thing for a cowboy to want to lather up with his buds while hanging his duds in a place they ought to be secure. The mystery is deepened and particularly concerning, as some of the cowboys have been working on ripening their jocks for months, and the prospect of going into town looking for new jockstraps doesn't thrill anyone except maybe the salesmen in the JCPenney or Sears men's clothing departments, though some of the cowboys don't complain too much if they get hold of a townie who wants to provide a personal fitting.
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From the album: Naked in Nature
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From the album: Naked in Nature
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From the album: Naked in Nature
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From the album: Naked in Nature
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From the album: Naked in Nature
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From the album: Naked in Nature
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From the album: Naked in Nature
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From the album: Naked in Nature
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From the album: Naked in Nature
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From the album: Naked in Nature
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From the album: Naked in Nature
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367. Reminder - Christmas Tree going up in the lobby tonight!
CalHowdy posted a blog entry in Loveless Motel Parody backup
Guests at Loveless Motel are invited annually to decorate their room doors and may purchase various holiday decor, including popular Christmas trees and decorative balls at Hit and Split, our convenience store located off the lobby. Too busy to decorate it yourself? Hire one of our staff members to attend to your specific requests. -
397. Weren't you at Birdwhistle's Tearoom last night?
CalHowdy posted a blog entry in Loveless Motel Parody backup
The possibilities are endless at Loveless Motel. The area between the Silver Bullet Bar and The Stables is a guest favorite for good old fashioned outdoor cruising in the woods. That guy you were eyeing last night at dinner, 3 tables over in Birdwhistle's Tearoom (located off the lobby) is suddenly right in front of you, and after oh-so-brief small talk ("Weren't you at Birdwhistle's Tearoom last night?" "Yeah but I left before dessert"), he's on his knees, asking for dessert. He's looking up at you, his mouth stuffed, while you guide him and keep him focused with your hand on the back of his head. And you're drawing an audience... -
378. Suit Up Sale just in time for Sweater Weather
CalHowdy posted a blog entry in Loveless Motel Parody backup
Mr. Billy Swallows and his assistant Dante' DeWitt have told us they have a new shipment of sweaters for the cool weather. Suit Up, the mens' atelier at Loveless Motel, is located off the lobby. This graphic example should prove to be one of the season's most popular.-
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- bottomless
- vintage
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From the album: The best GIF album EVER!
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348. Park it by the night, week or month - Loveless Truckstop
CalHowdy posted a blog entry in Loveless Motel Parody backup
Once you see our facilities, you may decide to make Loveless Truckstop your future home away from home. You can park your rig for any length of time. Full hookups are available for nightly stays, and long term storage is available too. And if all you want is a quick meal and some stimulating conversation, you've found the right place. -
In lieu of cattle, cowboys at Loveless often practice their roping skills on random passersby over near The Stables, and as any real cowboy knows, there are three things you should never leave home without. Your rope and your guitar.
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- blackandwhite
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At Loveless Motel, we sadly said goodbye to summer right on schedule - the last week of the month turned chilly and all the fun was indoors. Last weekend, October decided to turn up the heat and so we are currently experiencing Indian Summer in our neck of the woods, out around the Silver Bullet Bar, where there are loads of woodland creatures soaking up the sun, and looking for adventure. Fast friends are a sure thing at Loveless Motel.
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325. Blondes DO have more fun at Loveless Motel
CalHowdy posted a blog entry in Loveless Motel Parody backup
Proving the Clairol commercials are true, these blonde city boys have chucked their high-rise offices in favor of their low rise speedos and rented a camera from Shutter Bug Camera Shop to document their weekend, where they can get their collection developed in less than two hours. So can you, at Loveless Motel!
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