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Ticklers Lounge at Loveless Motel, located off the lobby, has a pretty strict dress code: coat and tie, and if you aren't wearing a coat, they have a few in the back they will loan you for an evening. Invariably, after a sultry evening of showtunes and pop laden with testosterone and queerness, like "My Boy Bill", "Mad About the Boy", "Secret Love", "We Kiss in a Shadow", and even "YMCA", sung in 12 part harmony around a piano that smells like scotch spilled on tweed and pinstriped wool, with a smoke chaser, it becomes more than a man can take and after last call and so the doors are locked for the few who want to remain behind. Though the suits stay on, the zippers come down. Some of these guys have been brought here by their employers as part of an extended interview process. "Are you able to speak in front of an audience? Are you outgoing - a bit of an extrovert? Do you enjoy showing gratitude in public?" These are questions a candidate for employment might well be asked, and should be prepared to demonstrate. Suits rule the economy, the social structure and stratosphere, and sexual hierarchy. Yes, cowboys and leathermen, you can only come in if you're on your knees and you put on that jacket.

Loveless Motel's First Annual Cat Show is fast approaching, and guests have sent in photos of themselves and their entries. "Snap" Wadmacher of Shutter Bug Camera Shop will be photographing the event with his best feline buddy, Litterace', the piano playing wonder cat, who also doubles as Snap's assistant, whenever a smile is required from a subject. "Snap" received the cat as a gift some time ago from a grateful guest Lee, for services rendered, who faithful readers may remember filled in for Paul at Ticklers Lounge after the waffle iron incident. The exhibition will be held in the Footlight Fairies Cabaret venue, located off the lobby, which will be transformed into a small auditorium for the event. Excitement is building as word gets around about the names of several high profile previous guests who have told us they can't wait to flaunt their pussies in front of an audience. Guests entering the contest will be housed in a section of units in Aluminum City along Tin Can Alley, where several units have had carpet removed and tile laid down. The park-like setting of the area is perfect for exercising your pussy, night or day. A frequent guest, a well-known exhibitionist and practical joker has sent a photo of his "entry", but Nic the senior manager has called him, and good-naturedly thanked him for his effort, and to say that we recognize that his pussy has been photoshopped in - nice try. Nic told him that he is "open" to another kind of "entry" and asked Psycho Randy to hold all his calls for 20 minutes.

Don't be the guy who's embarrassed at the crucial moment when he says "Get those legs up in the air!" Loveless Motel has the solution: let our popular yoga instructor, Mr. Stretch N. Spreadam teach you how to attain the most complicated positions with ease. Meet Stretch on the pool deck every odd calendar day, and in the evenings at Ticklers Lounge where he is a bar back

In an odd twist of fate, Paul, the blind piano player who plays nearly every night at Tickler's Lounge, the piano bar located off the lobby at Loveless Motel, has been sidelined for a week. A certified hustler with a questionable sense of humor who was visiting his room told heavily inebriated Paul that a waffle iron was in fact a hand warmer, and consequently our musician has square burn marks on the palm and several fingers of his right hand. As luck would have it, Paul's pal Lee has just begun a two week vacation in 3 bedroom luxury trailer at Aluminum City, and has offered to step in for a few days while Paul recuperates. Some may recognize Lee, who has a reputation among a lucky few for having beefy thighs that could crack walnuts, but we ask patrons to respect the privacy of our guests who are generally here incognito to experience some of the resort's more earthly delights

One of our frequent guests at Loveless Motel just sent us a few pictures of his stomping grounds in New York City. The only reason you'd need a suit here is to get into Tickler's Lounge, our piano bar, located off the lobby. He's a popular guest with a repertoire of over 200 show tunes in his suit, and 32 positions out of it.

Bar hopping - hitting the Leather bar crowd at the 8 Ball Bar at Loveless Motel on Saturday night, located behind the pool house next to the Laundry Room. Men dressed in appropriate gear are welcome, however if you saunter over from the Mauve Tavern or Ticklers Lounge, you will be likely barred from entry, unless you agree to have your coat and tie ripped off you in the dark room, in which case, you'll be promptly escorted to the back of the bar. Under no circumstances should you crowd around the entrance to the Laundry Room.