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"Do we own that?" Snap Wadmacher has been out traversing Nutbush Campground, drumming up business for Shutter Bug Camera Shop, located off the lobby at Loveless Motel, snapping pictures of campers, and got as far out as Bathtub Rock - his new name for the unusual rock outcroppings before entering a glacial plain, deciding to leave further exploration for another day. Now back in the shop's dark room developing the day's work, Nic's question was answered by Snap's. "If you don't know, who does?" Another question for the board, undoubtedly. Whatever the answer, the land holdings of LoveBird Inc. are vast and the answer is that the corporation owns land all the way to the large outcropping just beyond the green mound. Campers are wasting no time discovering various activities closer to the amenities and wooded areas of the campground, however. They'll be able to collect their photos in 24 hours for a reasonable fee. Snap, snapping. Who's snapping Snap? Tree climbing Using a divining rod to look for ground water Posing at the picnic pavilion for Snap, who has a big weakness for thick uncut cocks and nearly-shaved men and very low hangers Birdwatching Ass riding Hiking Slowly counting to ten, and then struggling to remember the names of the rest of the numbers Forage Stew for breakfast

In honor of Chinese New Year, some of the units in Aluminum City have been upgraded with new red carpeting and a stunning Chinoiserie hand carved rosewood chair with dragon handles; a souvenir teal colored enameled floor ash tray will be offered as a gift to the first 20 lodgers to book the units. These same units have had their wall paneling re-lacquered in a durable lead-based formula and an exciting shade created specifically for Loveless Motel called "Monkey Jungle Taupe." In an alarming effort to offer an experience consistent with the theming of our little Aluminum City hutong, "Forbidden (Fruit) City", an "edict" from Nic, the senior manager will be handed to any qualifying lodgers via an unexpected knock on the unit door, dictating that men staying in these units must either have fully developed facial hair, or be clean shaven - nothing in-between, and therefore will have to have their nascent facial hair forcibly removed in a sudden visit from Dick Gee, our resident stylist and proprietor of Mr. Dick Gee's Hair and Now, located off the lobby. Tickets to these surprise pop-up events can be purchased by interested onlookers at the front desk 30 minutes prior to each "home invasion" with all ticket-holding participant-voyeurs being asked to play the part of "angry villagers"

After the debacle of the drunken Christmas Card scandal, it seems the word has gotten out at Loveless Motel, and guests are requesting pictures of themselves posing in front of the tree in the lobby. Photo sessions are allowed only between the hours of 3 AM and 5 AM when the exterior lobby doors are locked. "Snap" Wadmacher, ace inhouse photographer at Shutterbug Camera Shop says his index finger is sore from all the extra action it's been seeing lately. Here's and example of the result: Calvin is currently staying in room 222 and has offered to provide "Snap" with something else to do with his finger.