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At the request of the chef at Birdwhistle's Tearoom, off-duty Officer Dick and his stalwart buddy Officer Rod have headed over to the nearly ready for occupancy Nutbush Camp Ground on an herb gathering expedition. Chef "Biff" Wellington prides himself on using local ingredients to make tasty fare which Loveless Motel gourmands say has an inexplicably narcotic effect. Trained as a US Marine cook in combat zones necessitating quick preparation and rapid relocation, Biff has a pragmatic philosophy in cooking and in life. Asked recently about the secret to his delicious Oxtail Soup, Chef Biff leaned over the counter, and with a confidential wink said, "Look, between you and me, not much, man. I just use whatever's available. You haven't seen any oxen around here lately, have you? This week, the Oxtail Soup is groundhog. Next week? Who knows! Git 'er done! Ooha! Semper Fi!"

Loveless Motel attracts a lot of cops, eager to make their quota for writing tickets, sometimes for the smallest infraction, even though a good part of the force are evening patrons, especially of Loveless Truck Stop and The Tubs at the bunkhouse. So generally, if you see a uniformed ociffer of the law inside the compound, interaction is generally welcomed, and Officer Dick can be real friendly.

Some guests have reported that they have been stopped by a local traffic cop identifying himself as "Officer Dick", who offers to "let it slide" for "a favor". Loveless Motel neither confirms nor denies that the "officer" in question is actually a guest himself. So far, every complaining guest says they complied with the request, were not issued a ticket, and everything came out ok in the end.

At Loveless Motel, our security staff, headed up by Officer Dick, who in his off duty hours watches over our property and guests with a staff of dedicated hands-on assistants, recently caught a local man trying to hot-wire a lodger's car in the parking lot over at Aluminum City. He was able to provide the gentleman with a demonstration of just what happens to those who are incarcerated for felonious actions involving auto theft. We can't confirm that the perp thought it was much of a deterrent, however. Guests of our adjacent trailer lot, Aluminum City, receive all the benefits and the immense talent of our watchful security staff, day and night, all year long.

Meet our weekend security team at Loveless Motel. Left to right, Officer Rod, Officer Dick, and Officer Peter. They're local cops moonlighting for extra cash and a free drink per shift. Don't be afraid to say hello - they won't bite unless you ask. They have been known to toss a few guys into the Hoosegow at the Bunkhouse for crowding around the laundry room. Punishment is stiff at Loveless Motel.

Our local sheriff appreciates how nice and attentive our guests are - the only calls he has to make on our property work out pretty good for everyone involved. Bucking his Bronco is language we speak at Loveless Motel