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ponding to an advertisement he saw recently in a resort trade publication, Taylor from Dallas, the Loveless Motel Junior Manager, ordered a pallet of 20 boxes of 30 lb. Institutional Size Cheez-it crackers in order to get 20 free inflatable pool mats in the iconic shape of the savory crackrs, complete with the center hole, and forgot to tell anyone about it. A few guests have already had the pleasure of putting the mats to use on the deck, and report that they do the trick and can be wiped down with a damp sponge if need be. Challenged with what to do with 600 pounds of orange crackers, Birdwhistle's Tearoom Head Chef told Nic, the Senior Manager, "The summer months will be prime time to move the "dainty" tidbits," When he heard of his wafer windfall he sent Nic an interoffice menu: "I've taken the liberty of creating some sample menu items on a list that should make good use of the product. This of course, is just a start"

At the request of the chef at Birdwhistle's Tearoom, off-duty Officer Dick and his stalwart buddy Officer Rod have headed over to the nearly ready for occupancy Nutbush Camp Ground on an herb gathering expedition. Chef "Biff" Wellington prides himself on using local ingredients to make tasty fare which Loveless Motel gourmands say has an inexplicably narcotic effect. Trained as a US Marine cook in combat zones necessitating quick preparation and rapid relocation, Biff has a pragmatic philosophy in cooking and in life. Asked recently about the secret to his delicious Oxtail Soup, Chef Biff leaned over the counter, and with a confidential wink said, "Look, between you and me, not much, man. I just use whatever's available. You haven't seen any oxen around here lately, have you? This week, the Oxtail Soup is groundhog. Next week? Who knows! Git 'er done! Ooha! Semper Fi!"