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536. Mr. Billy Swallows Action Zones and Snack Sacks
redheaguy51 posted a blog entry in Loveless Motel Parody backup
Mr. Billy Swallows and his assistant Dante' DeWitt have just received a shipment of comfortable "action" slacks in versatile 100% Dacron, which Billy says are "100% divine", at remarkable prices! Their atelier, Suit Up, located off the lobby at Loveless Motel, is well stocked and ready for you to come in for a personal fitting. Tape measure in hand, Dante' is always eager to know whether you dress to the right or left, and personally supervises alterations while you wait, time permitting. Stop by and get altered today! Billy and Dante' during a lull in business Dante' DeWitt, standing: "What possibly motivated you to buy two dozen pairs of synthetic stretchy slacks?" Mr. Billy Swallows, seated: "The salesman was all over me and demonstrated his 'action zone', and made me write a check on the spot. Don't worry - it'll bounce, and they'll sell out before we have to worry about it, with this cheap bunch that's been in here lately. Buying absolute bottom of the range, so give 'em what they want!" Dante': "Billy Swallows, you are SO bad...what are you reading?" Billy: "Sports Illustrated, and I'm not reading, just looking at the pictures - love the jockstrap ads; but Sports? - eeeewwww." Dante': "Oh, I know - I got kicked out of gym class for taking too many showers." Billy: "What are you doing, Dante'?" Dante': "Looking at this fucking chipped nail...it keeps getting snagged in my sweater - time to go see Dick Gee at Hair and Now, located off the Lobby. They have a dishy new manicurist. Dick said he does a good toe job." Billy: "Dick got that report from me. Where did you get that wedding ring?" Dante': "I was in town and had to go to the tinkleorium so I went up to the 3rd floor of Macy's, and well you know got hung up giving a blowjob under the stall, and while I was on my back looking up at Mr. Right Now, working his snack sack one ball at a time, he came, while he was jacking his cock, and he spooged on his hand and the ring slipped off his finger, and by the time I realized it had happened he had cum and gone, and there it was on the floor. I didn't get his name. Finders keepers, Billy" Billy: "Nice souvenir - better take it off before someone freaks out." Dante': "Jealous! I've already been propositioned three times today because of it. I just lower my voice and speak in one-syllable-word sentences while I readjust with my ring hand."-
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378. Suit Up Sale just in time for Sweater Weather
redheaguy51 posted a blog entry in Loveless Motel Parody backup
Mr. Billy Swallows and his assistant Dante' DeWitt have told us they have a new shipment of sweaters for the cool weather. Suit Up, the mens' atelier at Loveless Motel, is located off the lobby. This graphic example should prove to be one of the season's most popular.-
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Can you imagine that on a busy summer weekend at Loveless Motel, over at the Bunkhouse there would be 6 guys, strangers to each other; but while talking and dropping the soap in the shower, they discovered they all shared the name Marty? To celebrate they all headed over to Suit Up, located off the lobby, where Mr. Billy Swallows and Mr. Dante' DeWitt were able to highlight their best assets (and frontsets)
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Head over to Suit Up at Loveless Motel, for the latest in casual wear and mens suits. Seen here is our tailor, Mr. Billy Swallows, right, along with his assistant Mr. Dante' Dewitt, sizing up their client, seated, whose measurements will be taken for the perfect fit. You guessed it; they're located off the lobby.
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