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On Success



It has been more than a year since I wrote my first blog entry in the new blog. The first blog, where I shared only a few recipes, was replaced by the new blog system and the old one disappeared into nowhere. In the new blog, I also shared a few recipes. I also began to give an insight into my life. It is not a full view, but rather a view through the keyhole.

It has also been more than a year since I stepped down from my management position. More than six months have passed since I relinquished the last remaining 5 percent of the responsibility. It is astonishing how quickly time passes.

Several people desperately tried to question what made me give up my job. 

Why do you quit a job you like to do? Why do you take a new path without knowing exactly where it will lead you? Is it a thirst for adventure, is it a love of risk? 

Before I decided towards the end of 2018, I asked myself what and who is important to me in life. What else can I achieve in my career? How important is it? These questions and answers are somehow comparable to the question of what came first - the chicken or the egg. I had the answers to questions before I even formulated the questions.

Today I have a completely different question. Why did other people question my personal decisions? They are people who think they know me but do not know me well, who rack their brains over it without being part of my inner circle.

Kawika wrote something comparable to this in his last blog entry. Comparable does not fit exactly. However, there is a certain analogy, as it refers to the subjective view of another person. It was about the perception of an outsider about personal success. 

How can personal success be recognised? Is personal success visible or measurable?
Yes and no.

The success of a company can be measured and evaluated using figures. However, personal success cannot be measured in this way. Anyone who believes that a luxury car, a big house, etc. are signs of success, could be mistaken. Of course, that is my view. 

There are only a few personal successes that are visible to others. A passed exam crowned with a diploma is an example of this. But there are countless successes in our lives that only we perceive. These are the many small victories. When, after numerous attempts, I baked the first bread that was not only tasty but also looked like the bread of an expert baker, it was a great triumph. Although the proof was eaten up very quickly. 

I had answered the question of whether personal success is visible or measurable with yes and no. Yes, because personal success is manifested in one's personality. Someone's personality is expressed in many different ways. Body language, the articulation of the spoken or written word are only a few examples.

Would you be able to tell if I live a successful life, if we would meet on the beach and have an hour-long conversation about the beach and the ocean? 

How important is this to me? 

I would be delighted if you would answer this question. 

Edited by Tomster

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On 10/23/2020 at 4:54 PM, Kawika said:

Oh I have too and should have included that in what I wrote...

I'm glad you didn't. It gave me the chance to shed some light on another side. ☺️

On 10/23/2020 at 4:54 PM, Kawika said:

usually give very generously  to charitable organizations anonymously...

This is not directly related to your example. Also in this regard, the wide spectrum seems to be covered. From individuals whose donation is accompanied by a press release to those who wish to remain completely unnoticed in the background. I do not wish to condemn this in any way. Even those who might want to use it to promote their own label, HELP others in need. They also cause additional attention to aid projects. I can't imagine that anybody is concerned about gratitude when they donate. 

On 10/23/2020 at 9:14 PM, bakersman94 said:

nothing brings out the best in a friendship more than being appreciated.

That is very true. It is mutual recognition, expressed in words and gestures. Even though I like to express my appreciation with a compliment, I find it difficult to accept compliments. Ben and Pat outdo me on this. It is their culture that causes them to play down their own achievements. They feel uncomfortable when they are told that they have done an amazing job. 

@majikthisThanks a lot for the Bonobos. 😁🐒

On 10/23/2020 at 11:15 PM, majikthis said:

From what you have told us about yourself here at AM I would certainly deem you a succesful person. I understand you have that material success, too, that made it possible for you to quit your job. But more importantly you sound content, you show compassion and empathy and a genuine interest in others.

Thanks for the compliments. It is true. When I decided to quit my job I did not have to consider this aspect. I find it difficult to see it as a material success. I had the opportunity to acquire shares of the company when one of the three shareholders sold. I have contributed to the success of the company as managing director. The same is valid for every single employee. In retrospect, this investment was a good decision. Many see such investments as a risk. Yes, it could have gone the other way. It might be interesting to note that months earlier a change in the legal form of the company was being planned, which would have offered all employees the option of employee share ownership. 2 out of 80 were a little interested. 

Empathy and compassion are values that are important to me. As a born Christian (I later switched to my middle name) I grew up with these values. They are part of me and I never want to give them up. 

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On 10/25/2020 at 10:15 AM, malelover said:

You can achieve a certain level of freedom, yes.

That is exactly what I meant. 😘

On 10/25/2020 at 10:15 AM, malelover said:

one does not find such documentaries about wealthy people who hide their prosperity.

That reminds me of piece of news I read a couple of weeks or so ago

"(Irish-American mogul) Chuck Feeney has achieved his lifetime ambition: giving away his $8bn (£6bn) fortune while he is still around to see the impact it has made.

For the past 38 years, Feeney, an Irish American who made billions from a duty-free shopping empire, has been making endowments to charities and universities across the world with the goal of 'striving for zero … to give it all away' ... Feeney, who gave most of his money away in secret, said he hoped more billionaires would follow his example and use their money to help address the world’s biggest problems." https://www.theguardian.com/business/2020/sep/19/billionaire-chuck-feeney-achieves-goal-of-giving-away-his-fortune

On 10/25/2020 at 10:15 AM, malelover said:

that only the successes that are mostly invisible to others count.

“And now here is my secret, a very simple secret: It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” (Saint-Exupéry: The Little Prince - one of my favourite books)

4 hours ago, Tomster said:

from individuals whose donation is accompanied by a press release to those who wish to remain completely unnoticed in the background

I remember a few years ago I read somewhere that A. Jolie gave 160,000 dollars for some charity. And I was a bit pissed off, because I thought "the woman is worth bloody millions, why can't she donate more?" Then I realized the same thing you talk about: the important thing is that they do try to help AND draw attention to the causes they support. Yet I am also mindful of the advice (or warning) of Jesus: "Take heed that you do not do your charitable deeds before men, to be seen by them. Otherwise you have no reward from your Father in heaven. Therefore, when you do a charitable deed, do not sound a trumpet before you as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may have glory from men. Assuredly, I say to you, they have their reward. But when you do a charitable deed, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, that your charitable deed may be in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will Himself reward you openly." (Matthew 6)

🐵 Apes and other simians:

On 10/25/2020 at 10:15 AM, malelover said:

In the chimpanzee enclosure

I have always detested chimpanzees, probably because they are so much like us. I'd much rather gorillas were our closest relatives. I am not a zoophiliac, but I find silverbacks rather attracive. But then I have always liked big hairy men...


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