How many thinks he was born gay?

[CalHowdy]

Total queer...always have been. Never was even remotely curious about females sexually, not even as a kid.   For me there was never a "choice" to be made.  I remember when I was in my mid teens thinking, I have to stop jacking off thinking about men - that lasted about a week.  The first time  I ever jacked off was when i was in 7th grade...I had looked out the second floor bathroom window and saw my shirtless neighbor, a man in his late 20s, washing his car in the parking lot of our military dependent quarters condo complex.  He was tan, hairy and fit, wearing shorts - a young married GI, perfectly groomed - it was the mid 1960s. I got into the bathtub, had an erection, and while the tub was filling up with water, kneeling in the tub, i put my hard cock under the spigot - i was just curious - , feeling the full force of the water pressure. After a few short minutes  I had this wild sensation...this wave of pleasure.  My cock was purple when i finally pulled it out because the ecstasy was driving me crazy, having just cum for the first time, but not knowing it or knowing what to call it.  I kept up the bath thing for months.  My parents must have been thrilled I was taking so many baths...lol. It wasn't till a few times after the first time that I discovered that something was coming OUT of my dick...lol.

[Brucex]

Always have had an attraction to other males and never had any sexual feelings about women. A pivotal moment came when I was 18 and I saw Ken Russell's The Music Lovers which convinced me that I would be dishonest and cause hurt to all concerned if I tried to live as a heterosexual and get married.

[FruitLeather]

12 hours ago, redheaguy51 said:

Total queer...always have been. Never was even remotely curious about females sexually, not even as a kid.   For me there was never a "choice" to be made.  I remember when I was in my mid teens thinking, I have to stop jacking off thinking about men - that lasted about a week.  The first time  I ever jacked off was when i was in 7th grade...I had looked out the second floor bathroom window and saw my shirtless neighbor, a man in his late 20s, washing his car in the parking lot of our military dependent quarters condo complex.  He was tan, hairy and fit, wearing shorts - a young married GI, perfectly groomed - it was the mid 1960s. I got into the bathtub, had an erection, and while the tub was filling up with water, kneeling in the tub, i put my hard cock under the spigot - i was just curious - , feeling the full force of the water pressure. After a few short minutes  I had this wild sensation...this wave of pleasure.  My cock was purple when i finally pulled it out because the ecstasy was driving me crazy, having just cum for the first time, but not knowing it or knowing what to call it.  I kept up the bath thing for months.  My parents must have been thrilled I was taking so many baths...lol. It wasn't till a few times after the first time that I discovered that something was coming OUT of my dick...lol.

Had a similar experience too! I had started dry humping my blanket while I was “asleep” as early as 4th grade! I just knew it felt good as I thrusted my baby hips into a scrunched up ball of fabric. After a while, my back would start hurting, so I would sleep and do it all again the next day. I stopped for a year, completely forgetting about in 6th grade, until I came across the word “masturbation” in one of the novels I was reading (probably shouldn’t have been reading it). I noticed that what I had been doing in earlier years was just that (didn’t know what jerking off was), so I tried to replicate it. The sensation was the exact same as I remembered it. I kept at it for lots of times until one day, I suddenly felt a hot and sticky liquid come out of the cock, staining my boxers. I panicked and quickly got a new pair. After that, I stopped for a while, but I was still curious about how to actually masturbate, leading me into the world of gay porn.

[TychoEuripides]

BORN GAY:  I sent a valentine's day card to my principal in grade one. A six-year-old doesn't know what gay is or choose to be gay. But I knew I liked men at that age.

[Traveler]

On 4/22/2024 at 4:32 PM, Ludwick said:

...As a consequence of being different (in how I think / solve problems, my sense of humor, how I speak, my body language, my deficiency in reading social cues, my tendency to tell people they're wrong, and why, etc.) I tend not to fit in much of anywhere."... 

Have you considered that, in addition to being gay, you may have ASD? Are you also clumsy?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asperger_syndrome

"...The syndrome was named after the Austrian pediatrician Hans Asperger, who, in 1944, described children in his care who struggled to form friendships, did not understand others' gestures or feelings, engaged in one-sided conversations about their favorite interests, and were clumsy."...

[atomicscott]

I was born gay. I remember as far back as when I was five years old being intrigued by handsome men. My dad would take my brothers and me to the movies every weekend, and often times it was a sand and sandal movie—with shirtless men in skimpy outfits who would mesmerize me. Later, although I didn't like the theme of the show, I remember anxiously waiting for a shirtless Robert Conrad in the Wild, Wild, West.

I had absolutely no interest in girls, and I couldn't pretend. So in high school, college, and beyond, I never dated girls, but couldn't allow myself to indulge in my real preference—men. Instead, I focused my energy on school and my beginning career. I didn't come out until I was 26, and it was a heart wrenching experience (but one that turned out well), but I always, always knew that I was gay. 

 

Edited May 14 by atomicscott
added a detail

[Traveler]

3 hours ago, Ludwick said:

If I were to have ASD, I tend to think someone in my family would have noticed by now (since I'm in my 60s, have three family members who do have it, and my semi-retired older sister still works with special needs children.) I had to take a Myers Briggs personality test for work back in the 90s, and they assigned me "INTJ". "IN" types are sometimes misdiagnosed as having ASD. 

Unless someone in your family is a physician or nurse practitioner specialized in diagnosing the condition, they're probably not in the best position to rule it in or out. The fact that you have multiple family members with the condition definitely does not decrease the chance you might have it. Quite the opposite: there is a strong heritability of the condition:

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4381277/

"...Among children born in Sweden, heritability of ASD and AD were estimated to be approximately 50%. For an individual, the risk of autism is increased 10 fold if a full sibling has the diagnosis and about 2 fold if a cousin has the diagnosis. These findings may inform counseling families with affected children...".

https://www.cam.ac.uk/research/news/study-confirms-a-gene-linked-to-asperger-syndrome-and-empathy

"...A study published this month in the journal Molecular Autism confirms previous research that people with Asperger Syndrome (AS) are more likely to carry specific variations in a particular gene. More strikingly, the study supports existing findings that the same gene is also linked to how much empathy typically shown by individuals in the general population...".

At your stage in life, it may be a moot point. You didn't mention whether or not you were clumsy. If a person does have ASD/AS, there are specific counseling techniques which seem to be effective. Just something to consider. 

[MusicChris]

I had two girlfriends in high school taking one to the junior prom and the other to the senior prom.  I'm sure they my parents were pleased that I was developing "normally".  Not only that, I was the perfect gentleman, keeping my hands to myself quite respectfully of each of these two females, so the parents of these girls were likewise pleased! (I wonder why...lol)  However, also in high school, I met my first real love, a male my age with similar interests and background.  We fell in love and were together for the next few years.  It was easy to keep this secret because he lived 200 miles away.  (We met at summer camp.)

So was I always gay?  My first memories of seeing Playboy magazine showed me that I was wholly UNinterested in the females centerfold.  But Hugh Hefner was clever; he included an appeal to bisexual men, by occasionally throwing in articles about something like foreign films or art, with a sample of small frame pictures from a variety of source, sometimes showing two men!  I still remember that one, 40 years later.  So my attraction to men was clearly revealed to me when I went through puberty.  I'm not particularly femme, but even before that I did not like the aggressiveness of most sports and I preferred music and the arts; I'm the sensitive type and preferred the "less manly" pursuits.

I can't say that I was gay from the time I was born by genetics, but I don't think that genetics is the best explanation either--there are other ways a boy's body and brain can be shaped.  But I do believe that being set on the gay path, however that works, happened very early in life.

Edited April 25 by MusicChris

[Traveler]

18 hours ago, Ludwick said:

If I were to have ASD, I tend to think someone in my family would have noticed by now (since I'm in my 60s, have three family members who do have it, and my semi-retired older sister still works with special needs children.) I had to take a Myers Briggs personality test for work back in the 90s, and they assigned me "INTJ". "IN" types are sometimes misdiagnosed as having ASD. 

Although the Myers-Briggs personality test isn't made to diagnose, rule in, or rule out ASD, I did look the question up, and came up with this:

https://www.quora.com/Is-there-a-Myers-Briggs-type-most-associated-with-Aspergers

"...INTJs are usually the most socially awkward out of all the 16 types. They have a hard time reading social cues, adhering to social norms, and usually come across as arrogant and aloof. And since social difficulties underlie autism, they overlap a lot with INTJs. Empathy deficits are seen in both an INTJ (assuming he is neurotypical), and someone with AS.They also happens to be good at pattern recognition, a trait shared with most Aspies. For your reference, both ASD and the INTJ personality has a prevalence of 1.5% in the general population, which makes INTJ the most likely personality type for a person with Asperger’s...". 

[jonnie]

I know i was born gay.  I was attracted to boys although I didn't act on my attraction until i was 19.

[Traveler]

14 hours ago, MusicChris said:

...I don't think that genetics is the best explanation either...

The best theories at this time appear to be related to maternal antibodies/the environment in the womb, although genetics has an influence as well. Hormones in the womb also seem to play a role. I'm the youngest boy my mother had, though my fiance was the oldest boy and his younger brother is straight. That being said, I think his homophobic father's a fag (I'm not the only one who thinks so), so it may be genetics with my beau. His almost 60 year-old father gets hair highlights and wears pink clothing. 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Environment_and_sexual_orientation

"...Maternal immune responses during fetal development are strongly demonstrated as causing male homosexuality and bisexuality. Research since the 1990s has demonstrated that the more male sons a woman has, there is a higher chance of later born sons being gay. During pregnancy, male cells enter a mother's bloodstream, which are foreign to her immune system. In response, she develops antibodies to neutralize them. These antibodies are then released on future male fetuses and may neutralize Y-linked antigens, which play a role in brain masculinization, leaving areas of the brain responsible for sexual attraction in the female-typical position, or attracted to men. The more sons a mother has will increase the levels of these antibodies, thus creating the observed fraternal birth order effect. Biochemical evidence to support this effect was confirmed in a lab study in 2017, finding that mothers with a gay son, particularly those with older brothers, had heightened levels of antibodies to the NLGN4Y Y-protein than mothers with heterosexual sons. J. Michael Bailey has described maternal immune responses as "causal" of male homosexuality...".

Edited April 26 by Traveler

[Traveler]

4 hours ago, Ludwick said:

...Any clumsiness I have comes from my poor vision (I've worn glasses since I was five years old.)...

You may be right. Of course, while characteristic of Asperger's, clumsiness isn't part of the diagnosis. In fact, there's an accomplished surfer who's out about his Asperger's,  

People with Asperger's, because of their intense ability to focus, have gone to be great leaders in those fields which interest them. Without Asperger's, we wouldn't have such great men as Albert Einstein, Elon Musk, Bill Gates, Charles Darwin, and Nikola Tesla...

https://behavioral-innovations.com/blog/20-famous-people-with-autism-spectrum-disorder-asd/

[walterwz]

The only thing WORSE than being born Gay is being born Catholic.  True unlike being gay being Catholic was was my parents choice not mine.  Having grown up with the loud and clear message that you are BETTER DEAD than a FAGGOT, I really can't imagine choosing this particular version of hell.  The first person to say something less than venomous about being gay  was Dr. Ruth Westheimer when she was asked how she would react if one of her children were gay.  She said there was nothing wrong with being gay but she would have deep trepidation of her gay children having to deal with the social consequences.  As one of the many who ruined a good portion of my life trying to pray the gay away, the suggestion that I choose this taps some really intense pent up rage.  One curve ball I would throw here is to ask the question which does more real harm to real people, Rabid religious conservatism like the Catholic Religion or loving members of the same sex.  At the very least those who hide in their religious conservatism are living a lie.   The other issue with how society deals with homosexuality is the consequences of seeing homosexuality as deviance and pathology.  The real problem here is the social pathology and an overall diseased attitude and approach to sex.  While I certainly have all the scars I could want from growing up in a pathologically homophobic society,  I know if I did not have this challenge, I would never have broken free of the brainwashing received in the Catholic Cult.  The mass psychosis of Religious Cults and Theocratic Fascism will probably end in the extinction of the human race.  Pity we were never able to identify and deal with the real problem here.   

[Traveler]

8 hours ago, walterwz said:

The only thing WORSE than being born Gay is being born Catholic....

Thank God 😉 I was born in an atheist family, but if you think Catholics have it bad, Mormons have it even worse. Mormons are supposed to shun any family member who's gay, and gays aren't even allowed to be members. In many cases, these lies religions have spouted have caused not only the gay members to abandon the church, but, as the see the insanity of these policies, some of the families have left the church as well. Unfortunately, although religions have long feared that truth and facts would turn people away from their religions, it seems most people are so afraid of death, that they will ignore obvious facts and keep the faith. 

Even though we now know for a fact that earth is not the center of the universe--nor even our solar system nor our galaxy--so many people still believe in the Bible. Now that we know about oceans and different continents, only a madman would believe that every species of kangaroo and wallaby somehow hopped their way to Noah's arc, and back to Australia. Yet there are still so many who believe these crazy holy texts. Don't even get me started on the lunacy of believing the earth (including its human inhabitants) was created in 6 days, or that a man could live for days in a big fish. No, facts will not stand in the way of faith for many. At least scientists are allowed to do their work and not imprisoned or killed as in medieval times. 

[lengriffo]

I'm not sure if I'm 100% gay, I know I prefer a man to a woman, but, a few years ago, I fell in love with a girl. So I decided to keep an open mind and accept love, no matter what.

[Dunegay]

I was born gay but society (at the time) and my family made me pretend to be straight or bi. But I always knew I'm gay