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Big Gay Talk: For Gay men who had relationships with women, how do you feel about it now?


JoelR

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User esuom_y_nona wants to ask:

Back in high school, when I was masturbating to gay porn all the time, I somehow still saw myself as straight. (How? It was the 1990's.) Developed a crush on a girl, dated another girl for a few months, enjoyed kissing her, then she dumped me to get back with her ex, and I was heartbroken. Then in college I met another woman, who I repeatedly dated and broke up with over a period of years as I went through a very prolonged process of coming out to myself.

The college girlfriend is happily married to another man. She and I are on good terms. I even went to her wedding, and every year she sends me a Christmas card with pictures of her husband and kids.

The relationship itself was not really that bad. I mostly feel regret at the time wasted by repressing my feelings and not being out to myself.

What about you guys?

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bakersman94

Posted

to get my mom off my back, i went to the movies with a girl, but i wouldn't call it a date. i didn`t hold her hand nor did i kiss her. it happened twice with 2 different girls. i never knew these girls, and i`m not even sure how the dates were set up as i never asked them. i`m assume they were friends of my sister. i was only looking forward to seeing the movies, the girl was the only reason i was able to go. going to the movies at that time wasn't an option as i never had a job nor did i have the money, my mom paid for the dates. 

it did get my mom off my back in regards to having a girlfriend though!!

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Rhombus

Posted

Most other boys had girlfriends so I went through a few too but I always got dumped. I was just too interested in sex, even though my real interest was sex with men. I don't remember my times with women very happily. Only one realised how much loving I needed (I'm greedy) and my chief other interests were food/drink and...in a university environment... mocking pious people and do-gooders. Women don't sit easily with that, and not a lot of them are interested in big eating and drinking either. I also like loud women... most UK girls are shrinking violets and they like things like manners and patience. I haven't got either. I think that the thing that comes out of my straight years the most is that I felt cheated, in an "is this all there is?" sense. Fortunately my first boyfriend, his deeply sensual loving and his amazing cock made up for that.

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There is in western society also a certain amount of 'female conditioning' done to boys as they grow up... something quite subtle and mostly consisting of unspoken 'don't-dos' that you're supposed to learn.  I never did. I  remember being out with a crowd once and feeling lonely so I just said what I thought...that I didn't really want the social fake fun and needed to be spooning it with somebody and getting my cock played with. That didn't go down well. Similarly why are men always supposed to be tolerant / polite / suffering in silence when a woman attempts to 'cook'....usually by slinging some veg in boiling water and putting a poor old piece of meat in an electric oven? My response to this sort of post-world war 2 shit is usually " I want an Italian or fried chicken" plus some swearing. Third you're not supposed to compliment another girl on the size of her boobs if the one that you're out with can hear it. I've never worked out why that is.

       

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