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On Life II

Tomster

It has now been a little over a month since I first raised this subject.

What has changed since then?

Almost nothing has changed for me or us. The days became shorter and the temperatures dropped a little bit. We celebrated a few birthdays within eight days. The birthday celebrations were unconventional this time. These were two physically separated parties at exactly the same time at different locations, which were connected via video chat. Everyone has enjoyed it anyway. 

What I want to say is that there are always situations in our lives that cannot be changed. It would not have been possible for us to travel to Germany for this, as it was planned before. If there is no chance to change the situation, you have to make the best of it. That's what we did. 

I read a status update earlier: "Since the weather isn't going to cooperate with me this week with my quest to work on my all body tan & tanning needs, looks like I will be resorting to the tanning bed. Actually will be going to a different tanning business from my original one today!"

We cannot control the weather. However, we can find an alternative how to get the desired full body tan. 👍

What other options do we have if we cannot change a situation? Whining? Swearing? Does this help? 
Trust me, I loved to complain about everything. However, I have realized that this does not help me. On the contrary, it leads to a situation where you keep yourself trapped in bad feelings, negative thoughts. 

I still complain sometimes. But today it's a signal that I'm not happy with something. Through this awareness I am able to use a negative factor to create a more positive situation. 

What is the reason that you feel uncomfortable, unhappy? Do you know the reason? Have you made an inventory of your life? If your answer is no, you should do it. 
You have to know what you have, who you are, what your position in life is in order to develop into the desired direction. What are your weaknesses, what are your strengths? What are your dreams? What are your goals? Do you have any? 

If you have a dream that you want to make come true, you first have to check if it is realistic. If my dream, my goal, were to be President of the United States of America, it would be completely unrealistic. The reason is not that I can't use Twitter, but I am neither a born American nor an American. The latter could be changed. 

The bigger the goal, the more short and medium-term intermediate objectives are needed. There are always setbacks. These setbacks show that you are on your way. They help you to re-analyse yourself and offer the opportunity for modifications. Let us assume you are unhappy with your weight and want to lose 12 kg within 6 months. After a month of healthier nutrition and exercise, you weigh yourself again and the scale shows that you have lost one kilogram. 

Do you start whining now and tell yourself that you will never reach the goal? Are you blaming me because you ate my delicious cake? How about looking at this in a positive light. You've lost weight. You enjoyed exercising. You took the first steps. That's great. Adjust (extend) your time frame to get rid of the next 11 kilograms. 

What I want to say with all this. It's up to us how we handle a situation, what we make of it. 

We are how we think.


What and how do you think? 

 

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suzienudie

Posted

I read a status update earlier: "Since the weather isn't going to cooperate with me this week with my quest to work on my all body tan & tanning needs, looks like I will be resorting to the tanning bed. Actually will be going to a different tanning business from my original one today!"

We cannot control the weather. However, we can find an alternative how to get the desired full body tan. 👍

I thought that sounded familiar! 🤭

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Tomster

Posted

12 hours ago, suzienudie said:

I thought that sounded familiar! 🤭

Did it? 😉🤫😁

I admit there's a slightly change in the quote. I forgot the 🌦️

 

A small side note. My brother was happy with the cloudy sky today. He said he could work in the garden for longer. You know, weeds... 

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JoelR

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@suzienudie is going to have the best body out of all of us at the end of Covid LOL.  

I've definitely seen the sentiments in this blog get manifested through my friends.  There are some who have powered through coronavirus, with no problems.  But we have some other friends where it is ALL doom and gloom, all the time.  You'd think it's the end of the world that they can't get their bi-weekly mani / pedi / fresh shave (they're one of those straight metrosexuals).  

Part of me wonders if they don't have the correct social structure surrounding them, and if this their inability to work through life challenges is something rooted in a more basic or childhood psychology.  Not everyone has the fortitude to wake up every day and be able to overcome every challenge that comes their way.   I think it's important that if you have friends who are going through a challenging time to be empathetic and supportive.  The last thing you should do is say, "gosh, if only you had a better attitude!"  

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suzienudie

Posted

4 hours ago, JoelR said:

@suzienudie is going to have the best body out of all of us at the end of Covid LOL.  

 

Gonna make me 😊 again @JoelR 🤭
Just trying to keep from completely losing my tan. At least from losing my base tan, I am a mighty whitey if I lose my base tan! 🤭

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Tomster

Posted

It almost sounds as if @JoelR  wishes he had such a wonderful body as @suzienudie has. Nothing is impossible, but I guess it will take a little bit longer than Covid lasts. 🤔😉

17 hours ago, JoelR said:

There are some who have powered through coronavirus, with no problems.  But we have some other friends where it is ALL doom and gloom, all the time.

I experienced the same with friends and acquaintances. 

18 hours ago, JoelR said:

Part of me wonders if they don't have the correct social structure surrounding them, and if this their inability to work through life challenges is something rooted in a more basic or childhood psychology.

It is a matter of fact that if you have predominantly people in your surroundings who see everything rather pessimistically, negatively, you will adopt this attitude. The same is valid if you are surrounded by optimistically realistically thinking positive people. I think there is a connection between how someone grew up and if there were already real challenges to be overcome. Those who have already overcome a life crisis know their strength, know that they have the energy to overcome another crisis. 

18 hours ago, JoelR said:

Not everyone has the fortitude to wake up every day and be able to overcome every challenge that comes their way.   I think it's important that if you have friends who are going through a challenging time to be empathetic and supportive. 

That's so true. 

Everyone has his dark moments when hope is almost lost. If you cannot get your balance back on your own, you need a helping hand, but also the ability to accept help and to be open for new approaches. 

I myself have been actively using various techniques for self-motivation, inner balance and to achieve a more positive attitude for many years. This includes to use negative experiences and events to create something new, something better. 

Just give yourself a smile in the mirror when you get up in the morning. Then laugh heartily because the guy in the mirror has a crazy smile. 😉

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suzienudie

Posted

10 hours ago, Tomster said:

It almost sounds as if @JoelR  wishes he had such a wonderful body as @suzienudie has. Nothing is impossible, but I guess it will take a little bit longer than Covid lasts. 🤔😉

You need to quit! 😂
@Tomster has jokes now!

Oh the imagery!

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